I get it.
Social Media has gained a huge platform in the last few years and we spend more time browsing the internet, creeping on others “perfect lives” that we obsess over creating one for ourselves.
Pinterest has presented the fad that marriage must become a staple in our lives and Instagram has become a place of, if we aren’t posting romantic pictures on social media, then we’re missing out and falling behind with “the times”.
Personally, for me, I am old fashioned. I want to be pursued, courtship, meet-the-parents, “in the name of the Father, Son and Holy spirit, church bells ring-type of relationship gal, that’s me and if that’s just now how you do things, that OK too!
However, I gotta say… I’m exhausted.
Our generation has become compulsively obsessed with the simple idea of love and relationships that we feel the need to either be in one or help our single friends find “the one”.
Don’t get me wrong, I do think there is one perfect person out there for everyone and I don’t mean perfect in the literal sense; I mean perfect in the aspect that, this one person compliments your life in such a way that life is better together.
I believe marriage is a calling, just as much as it is to be single.
I couldn’t tell you how many times I’ve been set up within the last year, how many times I agreed to be set up on a blind date, knowing in my heart it’s not what I wanted, I couldn’t tell you how many times within the last year, I have had to be the jerk who puts guys in the friend zone because I knew deep down it wasn’t right nor was it a desire I possessed, to pursue a relationship.
At that point, dating no longer was something exciting, something I looked forward to. It felt like I was caving into the social pressure that I MUST find the one and settle down.
Dating felt more like a chore than an exciting part of my life.
Our generation already gets so much hate but we have got to stop idolizing the idea of relationships, we have to stop telling our friends to find someone to “talk to” or to settle for that “one” because he’s/she’s not that bad and there’s no “good guys/girls left” nowadays.
Don’t settle. Don’t compromise but we have got to stop pursuing a relationship or setting our friends up on blind dates because relationships are what’s trending.
The “politics” of dating in our generation has turned into something forceful, no longer enjoyable by either party. Each individual caves to the pressure of dating because the majority thinks it’s what’s best for them.
Our mentality and message to the generation watching us is: if you’re not in a relationship, you’re not going to find happiness or be happy and better to find someone, anyone than no one at all. It’s turned dating from something fun and enjoyable to something most feel they have to do, not something we want to do.
We have dismissed the idea of courtship and said it’s no longer necessary. I don’t believe chivalry is dead but we sure aren’t doing much to let it live on.
We’ve exchanged dates for text messages and real relationships and monogamy for something that “we’re not putting a title on”.
We have identified trust as something that has to be displayed and pronounced as “Facebook official”.
We have identified acts of affection as how many likes we get on our pictures or if we post a picture at all.
We’ve replaced commitment with comprising, sometimes leading to physical and emotional forms of abuse.
Our generation needs to take a break.
We need to stop forcing relationships to happen and guilt-tripping others for choosing to be single.
Happiness isn’t synonymous to a relationship.
So whether single or in a relationship, be supportive, don’t be pushy!!
My new corner 